There is MNS, there is Sri Ram Sena, there is Shiv Sena ... so I was thinking how about a women protection cell ? Lets call it Jhansi Lakshmi Sena !! or something better. A group of people who could help fight the atrocities committed against the modern Indian women without being dragged into the limelight by the media or otherwise.
The group could comprise of:
1. Few guys who can handle situations tactically
2. One psychiatrist
3. One lawyer
4. One doctor (optional)
These guys need not leave their jobs or whatever, its just a part time thing. I'd prefer it to be an ngo kinds with just nominal charges to cover operational costs, and because we register it as a ngo it'll be legally acceptable. Because there is no fear of being publicized or no 'defamation of family if you go to police station' and also we can associate with each other from the new generation, people can contact us easily without hesitation or even anonymously before they decide to show up. As this is not an ngo being run by a few aunties who got bored staying @home, we could actually take action rather than stage a dharna or go before the cam and shout at public.
We could start off with a website where people could register themselves in the above 4 categories, that way we have them within our reach whenever necessary. The more(contacts) the merrier.
Not a bad idea, is it ?
Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Incredible
After S and after KR, this is the 1st time I went out to a pub/disco which means I went out after nearly 6months (or more). And I had a real good company, 3 girls all committed so no complications :D The worst part of it though is that all their 3 bfs were working @office while we were partying around :D hehe ....
So we (D,A,V,me) first hit grillroom/fusion9 where there was a band playing, it was awesome music but the girls wanted to dance, so we had a few drinks n drove back to poison @11PM. Luckily withdrew money on the way. It was ladies night @Poison, and trust me the music, the ambience and the food was awesome, but the drinks were. I don't know why but V and I had 2 tequila shots and 1 large whisky raw but didn't get high (and this is after having 3 vodkas @f9 each, Do they mix something ?? or are we too excited to get drunk). D,A,V dance but as usual I just stay back and watch the folks dance on the dance floor (For those of you who haven't been to a pub/disco/dance floor with me, I don't dance. I like watching ppl dance + I can't dance + I have never danced. So I just don't. I just watch ppl dance, and trust me its really great to watch others dance, you learn a lot about ppl, both those whom you are with and those whom you have never met).
So after spending 2 more hours (i.e from 8PM to 10:30PM @fusion9 and 11PM to 12:30PM @Poison) we are back home. A who didn't have any spiked drink drove us back home, and after they dropped me they had to go some 7KMs odd to their place, so I dropped them @their place (I just couldn't let them go alone @1AM, its too risky) and came back home on my bike @ an avg of 80KM/hr speed (key word avg). V asked me to stay back @their place, but I just couldn't. I'm still in my senses, so came back home.
It's one of the best company I had since S i.e. for the last 1yr ... I could use the same company more. Though there was KR, we never went out to a pub or disco and it was more confined to parks or movies. Now that I'm single again, I'm glad I could go out. V was great and A danced good. D was hyper as usual :P.
PS: Slightly drunk, so might not make complete sense, but just wanted to post. Might review and refresh tomorrow morning.
Confession: Liked V, she's committed though :P :( (reiterating to myself, stay single stay single stay single ....)
That was just spurr of the moment, actually A is absolutely gr8 hehe, ofcourse she'z committed too.
So we (D,A,V,me) first hit grillroom/fusion9 where there was a band playing, it was awesome music but the girls wanted to dance, so we had a few drinks n drove back to poison @11PM. Luckily withdrew money on the way. It was ladies night @Poison, and trust me the music, the ambience and the food was awesome, but the drinks were. I don't know why but V and I had 2 tequila shots and 1 large whisky raw but didn't get high (and this is after having 3 vodkas @f9 each, Do they mix something ?? or are we too excited to get drunk). D,A,V dance but as usual I just stay back and watch the folks dance on the dance floor (For those of you who haven't been to a pub/disco/dance floor with me, I don't dance. I like watching ppl dance + I can't dance + I have never danced. So I just don't. I just watch ppl dance, and trust me its really great to watch others dance, you learn a lot about ppl, both those whom you are with and those whom you have never met).
So after spending 2 more hours (i.e from 8PM to 10:30PM @fusion9 and 11PM to 12:30PM @Poison) we are back home. A who didn't have any spiked drink drove us back home, and after they dropped me they had to go some 7KMs odd to their place, so I dropped them @their place (I just couldn't let them go alone @1AM, its too risky) and came back home on my bike @ an avg of 80KM/hr speed (key word avg). V asked me to stay back @their place, but I just couldn't. I'm still in my senses, so came back home.
It's one of the best company I had since S i.e. for the last 1yr ... I could use the same company more. Though there was KR, we never went out to a pub or disco and it was more confined to parks or movies. Now that I'm single again, I'm glad I could go out. V was great and A danced good. D was hyper as usual :P.
PS: Slightly drunk, so might not make complete sense, but just wanted to post. Might review and refresh tomorrow morning.
That was just spurr of the moment, actually A is absolutely gr8 hehe, ofcourse she'z committed too.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
I am ...
I am what I am. I had a lousy argument with a friend on male chauvinism today. I'm a feminist and I'm proud of that. As chauvinism today doesn't apply to guys alone, there is nothing wrong in a guy being a feminist (or atleast that is what I tell myself). Women today (even earlier) deal with more complex situations than men do. Agreed 90% of them are irrational when it comes to taking decisions, but it is only because they think with their hearts or sometimes don't even think but decide with their hearts :P. It's true: While women think with their hearts men think while testosterone is kicking in (I couldn't put it more decently :D).But how do you justify the exploitation ??
Do you see the News channels reporting page3 parties where the camera zooms to body parts of girls who are dancing (ofcourse with out their permission). It is supposed to be a NEWS channel for heavens sake, I understand the commercial aspect but ..!!!
Do you see the daily advertisements, "slim girls-thinly clad" seems to be the only theme
Don't get me started over dowry. WTF !! You are selling yourselves bloody idiots, don't you get that??
Huh!! The lone sharks at office, in college, on the roads and recently even hospitals !!
INTERNET... Yahoo chat, orkut, facebook, fake profiles n teenage girls. You know the stories.
Mobiles n anonymous calls
It isn't about a girl or a guy, but how can someone see so much of exploitation and yet not oppose it ?? Where is the nobility ? Demanding dowry is like claiming to be a Che Guevara fan without knowing who he is or what he fought for. I know its a very bad comparison, but that is the extent to which people are lost, even highly educated and qualified.
PS1: I know I wrote on this earlier (actually that was a better post) but its just frustration after an irrational argument.
PS2: I know there are exceptions to everyone and everything, the above mentioned is only a general scenario.
It isn't about a girl or a guy, but how can someone see so much of exploitation and yet not oppose it ?? Where is the nobility ? Demanding dowry is like claiming to be a Che Guevara fan without knowing who he is or what he fought for. I know its a very bad comparison, but that is the extent to which people are lost, even highly educated and qualified.
PS1: I know I wrote on this earlier (actually that was a better post) but its just frustration after an irrational argument.
PS2: I know there are exceptions to everyone and everything, the above mentioned is only a general scenario.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Dream vs Reality
One of my classmates from college wrote an article on "Prince Charming" Vs "Dream Girl" and claims girls evolved to be much better capitalists than guys :)
http://abbuluelectrified.wordpress.com/2008/12/11/
charming-dreams-and-princely-girls
Maybe maybe not, but being a feminist that I'm, for the 1st time I went ahead and commented on his blog(I usually avoid commenting on others blogs unless I'm really tempted to do so like this post :) ). But what really surprised me isn't the fact that he wrote this post(considering the few happenings in his life that I know of, such a post isn't much of a shock), but the fact that none of the guys opposed the theory, in fact everyone EVERYONE went ahead and supported the theory !!!
Now I'm surprised!! The only logical explanation I could come up with is that all these guys are from 'elite' institutes where girls/guys ratio is less :) and thus the 'frustration'. How else would/could someone explain a bunch of 'well-educated' guys gang up and bash all the girls in the world ?? more so when all/most of these guys are not even married :D (hehe well I understand such a post after marriage, but ...). Don't tell me that girls are soo film-ish that they would slap you or throw a sandal at you if you ask them out (atleast I haven't met one such yet). Maybe as a part of ragging seniors should educate young folks on how to impress a girl :D or even better how NOT to get into their bad books.
Lets try and get some basic facts clear, its always survival of the fittest be it evolution or just emotion. You can't expect to look shabby, talk rubbish, not respect people and yet be liked by the other gender just because love is blind, that's sheer bullshit. "Love is blind" only works(or is supposed to) when you impress the other person not during impressing.All that the other person is looking for is company where he/she will feel happy and secure, if those basics aren't in the correct place you can't really expect the relationship to work.
Once you impress the person/fall in love, you got to get the next theory right- he/she isn't your 'property', you are not given 700 perms(how geeky!) on the person. Both guys/girls would want their space with their friends, both would want their partner to look/be the best in their circle, both would want to 'show off' that they have the best partner one could get, both would like to brag about their partner... its all the mushy kinds, and its also the time when things could go weirdly wrong, too many expectations and if one is not ready to be in a relationship one shouldn't jump into(I like this in the western style, you take your time to say 'I love you' and when you say, you are ready and really mean it, and you don't do so just coz your friends encouraged you to or just out of sheer peer pressure). Well, the point is, one has to have the list of expectations his/her partner would have, in mind before jumping into a relationship and then trying to act idealist by saying 'looks don't matter' or 'you are expecting too much' or 'you are suffocating me' blah blah.
As my dad once said, "Relations are never stained, It's the communication that is". That apparently is the mantra for a happy life and luckily I have always sticked to it(of course I'm still single, please avoid the cliche, as Jane Austen puts it love has many forms like moments of time).
I know, I know this ought to be the most bakwaas post till date but I couldn't resist the temptation and I had to blurt out, at least some of it. All guys who would want to bash me, feel free to ping me :P and if at all someone is reading this post and wants to give me an example of an extreme person who doesn't fit the logic, please realize that its the same with the other gender too. If there are a few girls who are real emotion wrecks there are guys who are real jerks, so lets not get into specific examples. But generalizing I would say guys and girls aren't really different deep within, both are looking for a nice company, a company which would bring a smile on their face whenever they think of him/her, a company their parents would feel proud of to have in their family, a company their friends would envy.... a company who would stay with them in thick and thin, who would see their sleepy weird face in the morning and not run away but kiss them good morning :)
http://abbuluelectrified.wordpress.com/2008/12/11/
charming-dreams-and-princely-girls
Maybe maybe not, but being a feminist that I'm, for the 1st time I went ahead and commented on his blog(I usually avoid commenting on others blogs unless I'm really tempted to do so like this post :) ). But what really surprised me isn't the fact that he wrote this post(considering the few happenings in his life that I know of, such a post isn't much of a shock), but the fact that none of the guys opposed the theory, in fact everyone EVERYONE went ahead and supported the theory !!!
Now I'm surprised!! The only logical explanation I could come up with is that all these guys are from 'elite' institutes where girls/guys ratio is less :) and thus the 'frustration'. How else would/could someone explain a bunch of 'well-educated' guys gang up and bash all the girls in the world ?? more so when all/most of these guys are not even married :D (hehe well I understand such a post after marriage, but ...). Don't tell me that girls are soo film-ish that they would slap you or throw a sandal at you if you ask them out (atleast I haven't met one such yet). Maybe as a part of ragging seniors should educate young folks on how to impress a girl :D or even better how NOT to get into their bad books.
Lets try and get some basic facts clear, its always survival of the fittest be it evolution or just emotion. You can't expect to look shabby, talk rubbish, not respect people and yet be liked by the other gender just because love is blind, that's sheer bullshit. "Love is blind" only works(or is supposed to) when you impress the other person not during impressing.All that the other person is looking for is company where he/she will feel happy and secure, if those basics aren't in the correct place you can't really expect the relationship to work.
Once you impress the person/fall in love, you got to get the next theory right- he/she isn't your 'property', you are not given 700 perms(how geeky!) on the person. Both guys/girls would want their space with their friends, both would want their partner to look/be the best in their circle, both would want to 'show off' that they have the best partner one could get, both would like to brag about their partner... its all the mushy kinds, and its also the time when things could go weirdly wrong, too many expectations and if one is not ready to be in a relationship one shouldn't jump into(I like this in the western style, you take your time to say 'I love you' and when you say, you are ready and really mean it, and you don't do so just coz your friends encouraged you to or just out of sheer peer pressure). Well, the point is, one has to have the list of expectations his/her partner would have, in mind before jumping into a relationship and then trying to act idealist by saying 'looks don't matter' or 'you are expecting too much' or 'you are suffocating me' blah blah.
As my dad once said, "Relations are never stained, It's the communication that is". That apparently is the mantra for a happy life and luckily I have always sticked to it(of course I'm still single, please avoid the cliche, as Jane Austen puts it love has many forms like moments of time).
I know, I know this ought to be the most bakwaas post till date but I couldn't resist the temptation and I had to blurt out, at least some of it. All guys who would want to bash me, feel free to ping me :P and if at all someone is reading this post and wants to give me an example of an extreme person who doesn't fit the logic, please realize that its the same with the other gender too. If there are a few girls who are real emotion wrecks there are guys who are real jerks, so lets not get into specific examples. But generalizing I would say guys and girls aren't really different deep within, both are looking for a nice company, a company which would bring a smile on their face whenever they think of him/her, a company their parents would feel proud of to have in their family, a company their friends would envy.... a company who would stay with them in thick and thin, who would see their sleepy weird face in the morning and not run away but kiss them good morning :)
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Single or mingle !!??
It was a long day, not because I had lot of work (I did but work never exhausts me, surprisingly ..well actually nothing does, beats me why) but because of my presence during a list of relationships going haywire around me(none mine ofcourse, I'm still single & easy to mingle :D). Sad part of MY story is, all these sad endings I saw today had almost the same reason: "People wanting their partner to change"
My readers should correct me here if I'm wrong because I was never in an actual relationship(but for few short, no strings attached kinds), don't people in a relationship love the other person for what she/he is ?? Shouldn't that be the reason for love? If it is then why would you want the other person to change? I can understand if its some 10yrs down the line and both take each other for granted and feel they are the same heart & same soul and they actually saw the others lives completely & know if they need to change or not ... but early in a relationship ?!! even before marriage :O .. The question is WHY ?? Are people so desperate to be in a relationship that they are ready to give up what they are and what they believe in and what they want in their lives?? Are people so desperate to be in a relationship that they just go find a partner & change him/her according to her/his thoughts ??
I know a girl who is VERY rich and is planning on forming a trust and giving all the money to the trust with some share as dowry/gifts for her wedding (she lost her parents few years back so has to take care of herself) and wants live on self earned money (she is a doctor too), but 99% of the guys who came with a marriage proposal want all her money along with her and charity is unacceptable. duh!! We are guys, we are supposed to be egoistic and chauvinistic pigs, not want someone else hard earned money even if its your in-laws or even parents, and the other 1% want her to stay @home and stop working and be ideal homemaker, again duh!!!!! We are guys and should be proud in the circle of friends and colleagues if our partner is doing good in her career, isn't that how it should be in the minimum case if not all liberal ??
OK fine, another girl is modern and not very religious, after being in a relationship with her for around 4months or so the guys asks her to change her nature when they get married, he wants her to be a ideal Andhra bride, give up career & serve his parents, become religious (which she isn't, how come someone who is not religious become religious just for a relationship :O :O :O, I'm still in dark over this point, please enlighten me), and mostly a homemaker if that is what his parents would want. AAAAAAaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh then why her ?? Didn't he know that she is she & not someone he wants for his future ?? What made him think she'll change ?
Its almost the same when it comes to girls also, this another girl gets into a relationship with a guy who loves non veg, and she wants him to stop non-veg for her. But WHY WHY WHY ??? Can't you be a veggie while he is a nv?
As far as I see, relationships should not start nor go towards adjustments. Ofcourse marriage & relationships demand for a lot of compromises but it has to be the partners choice to choose and prioritize the list of adjustments, not be forced into. All you have to do is make her feel you are worth every moment and every compromise and every sacrifice your partner makes and is ready to make for you.
These are a few reasons I guess why any relationship be it in business or in life is given a 7yr target (A business is said to be stable if its crosses the 7yr mark, and a marriage is said to be successful if they are together after 7yrs :) )
PS1: This post may sound a little too pro women, but then ain't we all guys dogs :D
PS2: If Feb 14th is celebrated as Valentines day, lets celebrate Oct 16th as bachelors day (my bday :D)
PS3: I can write on this forever but I think I should stop now :D
My readers should correct me here if I'm wrong because I was never in an actual relationship(but for few short, no strings attached kinds), don't people in a relationship love the other person for what she/he is ?? Shouldn't that be the reason for love? If it is then why would you want the other person to change? I can understand if its some 10yrs down the line and both take each other for granted and feel they are the same heart & same soul and they actually saw the others lives completely & know if they need to change or not ... but early in a relationship ?!! even before marriage :O .. The question is WHY ?? Are people so desperate to be in a relationship that they are ready to give up what they are and what they believe in and what they want in their lives?? Are people so desperate to be in a relationship that they just go find a partner & change him/her according to her/his thoughts ??
I know a girl who is VERY rich and is planning on forming a trust and giving all the money to the trust with some share as dowry/gifts for her wedding (she lost her parents few years back so has to take care of herself) and wants live on self earned money (she is a doctor too), but 99% of the guys who came with a marriage proposal want all her money along with her and charity is unacceptable. duh!! We are guys, we are supposed to be egoistic and chauvinistic pigs, not want someone else hard earned money even if its your in-laws or even parents, and the other 1% want her to stay @home and stop working and be ideal homemaker, again duh!!!!! We are guys and should be proud in the circle of friends and colleagues if our partner is doing good in her career, isn't that how it should be in the minimum case if not all liberal ??
OK fine, another girl is modern and not very religious, after being in a relationship with her for around 4months or so the guys asks her to change her nature when they get married, he wants her to be a ideal Andhra bride, give up career & serve his parents, become religious (which she isn't, how come someone who is not religious become religious just for a relationship :O :O :O, I'm still in dark over this point, please enlighten me), and mostly a homemaker if that is what his parents would want. AAAAAAaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh then why her ?? Didn't he know that she is she & not someone he wants for his future ?? What made him think she'll change ?
Its almost the same when it comes to girls also, this another girl gets into a relationship with a guy who loves non veg, and she wants him to stop non-veg for her. But WHY WHY WHY ??? Can't you be a veggie while he is a nv?
As far as I see, relationships should not start nor go towards adjustments. Ofcourse marriage & relationships demand for a lot of compromises but it has to be the partners choice to choose and prioritize the list of adjustments, not be forced into. All you have to do is make her feel you are worth every moment and every compromise and every sacrifice your partner makes and is ready to make for you.
These are a few reasons I guess why any relationship be it in business or in life is given a 7yr target (A business is said to be stable if its crosses the 7yr mark, and a marriage is said to be successful if they are together after 7yrs :) )
PS1: This post may sound a little too pro women, but then ain't we all guys dogs :D
PS2: If Feb 14th is celebrated as Valentines day, lets celebrate Oct 16th as bachelors day (my bday :D)
PS3: I can write on this forever but I think I should stop now :D
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Womens day, hyderabad and ...
"
I was taken aback when one of our writers told me that her aunt was not allowed into a nightclub a few weeks ago because she was wearing a salwar-kurta. She was told that on an events night such as the one on that Wednesday, salwar was a strict no-no, that the aunt and others with her were finally allowed in after saying she was a journalist.
If in earlier days it was British imperialism that did not allow you to enter a sahibs club without a suit and boot(you still can't as a matter of fact), these days it is the American hegemony. We not only go to the pubs and malls like the Americans, but have dress rules like them too. Remember we are still in India which has strong traditions of dress and culture that cannot be ignored despite our predilections for coke and burgers. What could be a nightclub's objection to the sari or salwar? Whats is the point we are trying to make with such rules - that people who wear saris and salwars are mummyji types who cannot enter pubs? Or that there is no place for older women who cannot think of dressing in any other way?
Fashion designer Sabyasachi seems to have similar views. I quote from the interview: "I think a woman covered, showing just an inch of her ankle is more sensual that a woman who blatantly exposes because she doesn't leave anything to the imagination".
Indeed as Sharmila who brought yogasanas and pranayama back into our life says, the west has taken the best out of India - yoga, ayurveda, spirituality, food - and has given us in return BPOs, pubs and fast food and stress. Naturally, if you party like that every night and still have to look fit so that you look good into all those western clothes, boy, do you need to worry!
What we need, on Womens Day and all other days, is freedom of the mind. To be what you are. There are photographers, artists and pilots following their heart's dream even if society seeks to set rules about what women must or must not do.
"
and this comes from Ratna Rao Shekar - Editor WOW magazine
and yes I typed the whole post myself, not a copy paste phew!! but then I really found the article worth being mentioned on this blog :)
Though I don't complete agree and I think there must be some dress code to maintain the pub standards, but then I'm sure a strict no-no to something is always bad and infact brings down the reputation.
Hyderabad is changing and so is India ... sometimes for good and sometimes for worse. One has to live with it and adapt to change.
I was taken aback when one of our writers told me that her aunt was not allowed into a nightclub a few weeks ago because she was wearing a salwar-kurta. She was told that on an events night such as the one on that Wednesday, salwar was a strict no-no, that the aunt and others with her were finally allowed in after saying she was a journalist.
If in earlier days it was British imperialism that did not allow you to enter a sahibs club without a suit and boot(you still can't as a matter of fact), these days it is the American hegemony. We not only go to the pubs and malls like the Americans, but have dress rules like them too. Remember we are still in India which has strong traditions of dress and culture that cannot be ignored despite our predilections for coke and burgers. What could be a nightclub's objection to the sari or salwar? Whats is the point we are trying to make with such rules - that people who wear saris and salwars are mummyji types who cannot enter pubs? Or that there is no place for older women who cannot think of dressing in any other way?
Fashion designer Sabyasachi seems to have similar views. I quote from the interview: "I think a woman covered, showing just an inch of her ankle is more sensual that a woman who blatantly exposes because she doesn't leave anything to the imagination".
Indeed as Sharmila who brought yogasanas and pranayama back into our life says, the west has taken the best out of India - yoga, ayurveda, spirituality, food - and has given us in return BPOs, pubs and fast food and stress. Naturally, if you party like that every night and still have to look fit so that you look good into all those western clothes, boy, do you need to worry!
What we need, on Womens Day and all other days, is freedom of the mind. To be what you are. There are photographers, artists and pilots following their heart's dream even if society seeks to set rules about what women must or must not do.
"
and this comes from Ratna Rao Shekar - Editor WOW magazine
and yes I typed the whole post myself, not a copy paste phew!! but then I really found the article worth being mentioned on this blog :)
Though I don't complete agree and I think there must be some dress code to maintain the pub standards, but then I'm sure a strict no-no to something is always bad and infact brings down the reputation.
Hyderabad is changing and so is India ... sometimes for good and sometimes for worse. One has to live with it and adapt to change.
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